just in case you haven't heard...

this morning i am watching the news...here are two interesting pieces of info i thought the blogging world might find interesting if you haven't already heard:

1. a couple tied the knot in Michigan in the SHOE AISLE at TJ Maxx. the bride had always imagined getting married there...

http://www.bakersfieldnow.com/news/offbeat/99364869.html

2. Robert Pattinson is making a new movie with Reese, and they are filming in chattanooga/georgia! the movie is called "water for elephants"...interesting.

happy THURSDAY...

the real world

i have no new exciting news for the blogging world- this past wkend i went home and hung out with michael and friends. it was really nice to be home, i always cherish it as long as possible.
this week is going to be a little crazy. i signed a lease for an apartment and i can start moving in on thursday. i am super excited and a little sad too (to be away from home for real). i feel like signing that lease kindof put some order to my life. i felt like a nomad traveling from hotel to hotel- which is where i am right now! i'm also really stressed about moving and packing...i despise packing. it is awful. it is maybe one of very few things in life i despise. when i was younger, i always waited to the very last minute to pack, and usually mom ended up doing it for me because i put it off for so long or just didn't want to deal with it. isn't that terrible? i also despise flying---which goes hand in hand with packing. imagine that. and my dad is a retired pilot! ha!
anyway- that's a quick update....more to come!

Discipline

so i was thinking a few minutes ago what i should blog about. i was thinking i could give an update on this job i've taken, or talk about the lonely hotel room i'm staying in where i'm laying on my bed watching the bachelorette...or i could write something sortof deep! i decided on the latter, only because i feel like all of my conversations and interactions today have been somewhat surface. i also have a reason to write about something "deep" because i was interested in the real definition of the word "discipline".
with that said, the webster definition of the word "discipline" is this: "control gained by enforcing obedience or order; orderly or prescribed conduct or pattern of behavior". when i started this blog, my intention was to write alot about running and training for a marathon or half marathon. and how sometimes those trainings can be analogized to life. i feel like you can only write about so much with that topic. but today, i was thinking how this pertains to my whole life (the word discipline).
i've been trying to read the Word almost every day. not only because i know it is the right thing to do...but because i've realized more and more my need for hearing it, gaining direction, encouragement, and for deepening my relationship with the Lord. and He's given us all of those things in Scripture. i guess my point is that i want to be more in tune with being disciplined in spending time with the Lord---not just with reading my Bible, studying it, and hopefully by God's grace and Spirit, applying it, but also with prayer and community with other believers.
last thing- this came from the book Valley of Vision, a book of Puritan prayers. i love it- it seems like every single prayer in this book is so applicable and you can relate so well with what each of them says.
"Teach me that it is wisdom for me to pray for all I have, out of love, willingly, not of necessity; that i may come to thee at any time, to lay open my needs acceptably to thee; that my great sin lies in my not keeping the savour of thy ways; that the remembrance of this truth is one way to the sense of thy presence; that there is no wrath like the wrath of being governed by my own lusts for my own ends."

new beginnings...

my life has changed tremendously since monday...actually last friday. i had a job interview in brentwood, tn last friday and the job was to start monday morning at 715. that meant, i had a couple of days to get my bearings in brentwood, find a hotel to stay in this week, and i felt like i had to figure out life as we know it for this chapter. do i sound dramatic enough yet?

i'm excited and scared at the same time about this phase of life. i almost broke out in a panic attack/tears when i was sitting in the office manager's office...just because i knew my life was changing. and can i just reemphasize that i don't like change. it stinks. to me, it is one of the hardest things. especially when ALOT of different little things change all at once. it's like i realized my "home", friends, environment, everything i knew that was familiar was going to change. and looking back on one of my old posts about looking to the next thing, it's funny to me now. because this new chapter was right around the corner and i didn't know it.

i've learned a few things this week about work and people in general. and i can't think of the actual quote right now, but several things this week "brought me down" and all i could think was how discouraged i felt. but then a quote or song or something came into my head that said you just had to prove yourself and pick yourself up and try harder/work harder at fixing whatever is going wrong. obviously i went through 2 years of school learning things and i know i can do it, but ALL the time we have to look beyond our own skills/strengths and onto trusting the Lord.

i miss alot of things already about home. and tomorrow i'll head back to memphis to seriously think about moving/apartments/this job/etc.
life as i know it is definitely changing...

inspiration

my friend at work inspired me to do a spreadsheet on excel of my 1 yr, 5 yr, and 10 yr goals. i recommend that everyone do this...and also specify how you plan to meet the goals. i've learned over the years that we can have totally LOFTY way over-our-head goals, and they are never too difficult to attain if we put forth effort and develop determination and perseverance. 3 years ago after finishing a 1/2 marathon, in fact that day of finishing a 1/2, i was in the hotel room with my parents just throwing the idea around of "i can do a full marathon- i saw people my age out there doing it!" although i had many doubts about being able to complete one- and actually, my mind couldn't even GRASP the idea of finishing one and running that many miles- it took determination and perseverance along with training to finish one. i've marked it off my checklist of things to do in life- but do i stop there or look ahead for an even higher goal of having a better time or training better for another one? when i've talked to people after finishing that marathon in 2008, i tell them- i am definitely not doing that again! it was too hard and one is enough...but really, why stop there? i know i can do them, why not push myself and attain an even higher goal of a better time or qualifying for the boston marathon? i know it can be done. so now, that is one of my goals (and i definitely give credit to my friend who also has this goal). life is too short to not have goals and think you can reach high things if you just work at it and really focus on reaching them. i'm really excited about my goals spreadsheet and about developing even more. i left room under each category to add in new goals...we can definitely have "set" ones we know for sure we want to accomplish, but there are always going to be new things we want to try. we may have doubts we can do them, but sometimes those doubts overwhelm our trying and we end up being too discouraged to even put them on a goals list.
last night i also budgeted. i feel so old, but the time is fast approaching where i have to think about money and spending and every single expense i will have for the future. planning ahead is a big deal for me and is an important part of my every day life situations! i love planning...but i am not necessarily the most organized person. i figured last night- i am 23, and although i don't want to grow up, move away from home, have a full-time job- this is where the Lord is using me and calling me now during these moments, and in the everyday mundane things, we're still called to honor Him/glorify Him and praise Him.

and the chapter continues

i feel like my titles to my blog are more dramatic than my actual posts. haha. today i am going to another job interview here in memphis. not exactly where i want to be, but it is an interview and i am not nervous at all. i realize every time i write the date that days go by so fast, and this summer is halfway over almost!

one thing i don't like about my schedule right now is that it is nonexistent. i'm not very content with my situation---that i am still looking for a job, still waiting for my dental hygienist license number, and living at my house has its advantages and disadvantages. i had a breakdown yesterday because i don't know if i am "ready" to be on my own and be independent. it's so scary, and for the longest time growing up i felt like i would always be "ready". i would be that person that could move away from home really quickly and be independent. but lately, i have felt more scared than ever. obviously, we all love our comfort zones, but i am beginning to love my comfort zone more and more when i think about moving away. ideally, i would love to be in nashville.

(a picture of michael and me in nashville last summer).

over the years, i have grown to love this city. i think the reason our age people like it so much is because it seems like it is "thriving". like there is so much to do there as opposed to memphis. one of my mom's friends said she knows a person my age or a little older that just moved there and in the church she goes to, the young singles/professionals sunday school class has over 1500 people. DANG. there's so much to see and do at this age- why not go and do? my mom asked me yesterday what my goals were for the next few years...which when i think of goals right now, i think of very short-term. like i want a job is my number one goal right now...but as i was thinking about it, usually if you don't have goals or make them, you usually don't finish them. so i've decided to really consider it and list them (in no particular order). they seem so superficial...but here they are:

- a good job in an office i like with people i like and patients i like!

- a family- i want to be married and have babies...

- involvement in a sunday school and growing church community

- travel to south korea

- train for another 1/2 marathon

- go to grad school and get my masters

- be more organized and clean

- cook more and become more domestic

- pick up a new hobby :)

i think that's it for now! ambitious, right? life is so sweet- and when i think of verses in the Bible that describe our lives as fleeting, i think of making the most of our days with what we are given on that day. (psalm 39:4)

when life throws you curves

so the past few days have been spent traveling with mom to virginia beach, va in order to study and retake my SRTA electronic exam. the beach is not as grand as it used to be for me...maybe because i'm not as concerned anymore about getting tan, the sand is still fun to "play" in but i had noone to play in it with, and more than 3/4 of the people in virginia beach had many tattooes all over their bikini bodies and it made me feel very out of place to say the least---as i sat in my lounge chair with my vera bradley patterned bathing suit- haha!
BUT, the beach still amazes me because when you're sitting there in the morning and at night just looking out at the ocean, all you can really think about is WOW, God made this, and how little you feel when you see yourself in perspective to everything He has created.
today we drove to the SRTA office (which was in a daycare looking facility- there was a playground right next door fenced in) and i retook the electronic exam. as nervous as i was, i was also humored by the fact that the facility was run by 2 girls about my age and ethnicity. so i sat down to take the exam over a 60 minute time frame and was out of there! mom and i went to the airport and made it to atlanta...but now we are stuck in a hotel here. and when life throws you curves such as this, all you can do is take it in...which means we ordered in pizza and a salad and 2 diet cokes. my bag was checked all the way to memphis so i have no clothes or anything---so i'll sleep in my mom's shirt and use the hotel amenity guest package full of toiletries. so when life throws you curves, you have to go with the flow...and we certainly are doing that. which is actually kindof fun, now that all of my stress is relieved after passing the exam. i was so anxious about finding out my results, especially since we travelled all the way here for me to take it!! well peace out from a-town. and hopefully on to memphis in the morning!!
ps- in airports you see the most interesting people no doubt.